When a devastating event happens in your life sometimes it takes years to recover; You find there is no way to pick up your life again. The only way to go forward is to find a new normal.....even if you don't want a new normal....things will never be the same.
Things will never be the same without our Jeremy. He is so loved by his family and friends. His sister and I are missing him more than any words could convey. Jeremy is special on so many levels.
With that said; our lives have changed - turned upside down. I thought I would never find my way again. I have had to make up my mind....make a focus and determined choice....make the decision to not suffer in darkness and to reach for happiness.. Believe me when I say....it is a choice and as easy as it sounds...it isn't.
I start each day focusing on the good and finding a bright and sunny thought....next thing you know I have another bright and sunny thought. I count all the blessings that have been bestowed upon me. First and foremost the honor of being Mom.
I have asked the question over and over....how can you be happy with a broken heart?
The only answer for me is the peace that surpasses all understanding. Beneath all the sadness and tears there is a safe place - a place of comfort and peace......a place that holds beautiful spiritual truths and promises. A place where truth and love are always present and promises are never broken.
I am thankful for what remains and knowing Jeremy fulfilled his destiny;
I am proud of both my children.....wish I could have been a better parent and friend in the past but look at the future to be a more spiritually powerful and positive influence. I pray I fulfill my destiny....Jeremy set the bar high for us all.
In God I trust....always.
Proud Mom of Ssgt. Jeremy D. Smith USMC