Memoirs with Jeremy

I believe that thoughts become things; I believe we have free will and choice along our path, however; I also believe that when we take a rabbit trail off our path that eventually we return to the main road we are to travel.  Sometimes these rabbit trails can bring joy and many times there are things to be learned from our choices.

I believe that we do have the power with our thoughts to attract positive people and “things” into our lives; the counter to that is with negative thoughts we also attract the negative people and “things” into our lives.

I know that the contrast of having positive versus negative in our lives also brings us to a place to more appreciate the good and positive people and “things” we are blessed with.

I believe we have agreed to encounter our challenges and struggles to accelerate spiritually.  Sometimes a tragedy happens to a family that is devastating.  When physical death or tragedy happens to someone we love I believe that prior to being birthed into this world and the planet earth that we have all made a contract, agreement, chart or a blueprint to accelerate spiritually – together.

There are many beliefs, religions, cultures, churches, mediums, people….and we all have different ideas regarding the spirit realm. I have studied many different beliefs since the inception of my son’s transition 04-06-11 and all I can do is share my life experience and what resonates with me.  I believe everyone should decide for themselves and not let any one person, place or thing influence what your “gut” is saying to you.

I have been reading a book that shares…. “Old Newton physics claimed that things have an objective reality separate from our perception of them.  Quantum physics, and particularly Heisenberg’s Uncertainty Principle, reveal that, as our perception of an object changes, the object itself literally changes.  The science of religion is actually the science of consciousness, because ultimately all creation is expressed through the mind.  Our greatest tool for changing the world is our capacity to “change our mind about the world”. (Taken from A Return to Love by Marianne Williamson.)

I believe that expressing Jeremy’s transition through a positive mind and spirit does change my perspective of his physical death.  I find the tragedy of his not being physically with me more tolerable and not as painful as long as my thoughts of him are of transitioning and Jeremy being in a realm that is happy, healthy, whole and in a loving world.

I have begun telling him to have a good day and asking him to reveal to me what he is doing today.  I talk to him a lot and when I do I receive responses back from him.  There have been times he has physically manifested a scenario to “prove” to me that he does live on.

I have in the last eighteen months begun to apply “thoughts becomes things” attitude to my life as I had before the tragedy.  It has been a hard journey trying to process that my son has transitioned and I will never get to hug him physically again in this lifetime. But, he reminds me often to go forward.

There have been small things I have done to help my process.  After mulling over specific words as “acceptance”; I am learning to choose words that better suit my soul.  For example, I believe what happened to Jeremy is unacceptable, but I know I need to process his transition.  I choose to process in a more positive way than to focus on his physical death.  I choose to focus on his transition into a loving spirit realm.  I have felt his essence and there are no earthly words to describe his joy.

I contemplate the Heisenberg Uncertainty Principal and I believe that our perception of such a horrendous tragedy as our children transitioning before us can lead us to apply a more positive principal in our lives.  I choose to think thoughts of happiness and joy for Jeremy.

I choose to find and apply positive thoughts and ideas; for me this is a spiritual journey.  There isn’t any way to change our children leaving before us, but we can choose to grow spiritually and create a life experience that is more positive and of Light. 

It is the Light that gives us the peace that surpasses all understanding.  I choose the Light, I choose Peace and I choose to apply any and everything I can find that is positive into my life experience now.  It is the new normal and it is the only way I can find to go forward.  I choose to be One with the Universal Mind and Love of God being one with the universe and all consciousness.

On behalf of my son; I extend to all spiritual love and peace to enter your hearts.

In love and understanding,

Sandra xx

Proud Mom of Ssgt. Jeremy D. Smith, USMC, 03-09-85 – 04-06-11