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Sunday, June 24, 2012

Memoirs with Jeremy


From everything I have read and to all parents that I have spoken to the rule of thumb is that you start some healing from losing your child when you can get to the hard place of acceptance.

I have never felt as though I could truly “accept” the tragedy of losing my son, however; there are no other options.  You cannot go back as much as you would like to set the clock back and do a rerun and have the ending much different from what it is today.  It is too hard to accept that your child has “crossed over” before you; it’s just not natural.

I am and have given this much thought and I have come to believe that the negative impact of acceptance of their transition is placed on death, however; the positive impact of their transition of starting a new life just in another dimension I find more palatable to my soul and heart.  I can accept new beginnings for my son.  I can accept that he is truly in a better place.  I can accept that he is more alive and peaceful than he has ever been in the physical realm.  The list is actually fairly infinite and if I learn to keep my eyes on that he is waiting for me and helping me pave along my journey; guiding me and teaching me then I can keep my eyes more on the fact that he truly lives on and we will be reunited one day sooner than what our real time reality is.

I am keeping focused spiritually and it is the only thing that I find strength and healing from and it isn’t a crutch for me and I do not feel there are false hopes in the fact that Jeremy lives on based on the fact that he has talked to me and I have had wonderful visits from him and feel his presence strongly at times and more subtly others.

I can accept that his transition is a beautiful journey filled with love, peace and joy and that his vibration is so strong that he has to lower his energy to meet in the middle for our connection.

In love and understanding, Sandra xx

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