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Saturday, May 12, 2012

Memoirs with Jeremy

I have "gotten through" this day; the day before the celebrated “Mother’s Day”.   I have unfortunately have lost a family member that is beloved to the family.  Today was his funeral – I could not take this on.  I feel so badly that I could not do this; however; it has brought back memories too close to my heart to be able to endure.  To be honest; it has caused a true meltdown for me.

There was too much agony stacked upon grief that I am too familiar with and to protect myself I had to simply do my “coma” sleeping.  But, for me today I have decided to call it my “power” sleeping.  It is the only way for me that I have been able to endure the year plus.  It is a little more positive wording.

I did venture out to my neighbors today for they were celebrating a very lovely young ladies graduation from law school.  I made it just in time to meet the special young women who has graduated and I would like to say she seems very much exceptional to me.  It was motivating to meet someone so young who has a good sense of what lies before her.

Coming home I felt refreshed being amongst a family that is celebrating and having a life that is so full.  I am truly happy and ecstatic for them…… I know how much Jeremy’s Bachelor’s Degree meant to me as a Mom.  She is a lovely women and I feel she has exceptional qualities.

I wanted to share this because it is one of the ways to be truly joyful from your heart for others.  I felt so blessed leaving their company because of the work that has come to fruition for this young women.

Yes, I have to ask myself…. Am I going to be truly joyful for them in the fact that my son was only able to receive a posthumous Bachelor’s degree – I will have to say yes….. It is the only way that love comes full circle.  I am so joyous for this family to celebrate a lawyer’s degree that has been so steadily worked hard for and after years of training and education finally received. 

This is the joy that comes from the peace that surpasses all understanding….it is not something I will experience with my son, however; it is still extremely joyous to capture the connection of love, support and respect one for the other in the full circle of life. 

I know my son is celebrating with this very special family as well.

In love and understanding,

Sandra xx

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